I need to set up this post a bit.
I believe in relaxing in the summer.
I believe in having my girls play without end in the summer.
I believe in reading until you want to stop.
I believe in a spontaneous afternoon movie on the couch with my girls.
I believe in long days with 'nothing' to do and doing everything you want to do.
With that said...
At the start of each summer we sit down as a family to discuss the summer.
This summer it felts especially important because it is the first summer we are not going away. Sigh... traveling is very challenging for our family under the best circumstances. Abigail can eat nothing unless it is cooked by me. When she orders from a restaurant she can only order rice, pasta, plain chicken or steak. Nothing else. Sometimes if we're lucky, bread. So basically we are not an eating out family. However we don't let that stop us from traveling or stop Abigail from having a full life experience - and travel is part of that. Anna has some challenges with travel as well as she deals with sensory integration disorder. So when we choose to travel each summer we already have to take a lot into consideration. And we choose to travel to show them that nothing should stop them from a full, lovely life. However, adding in Covid 19 this year... we honestly are just not comfortable traveling. We have a lifetime of summer adventures traveling so I have finally found a peace in his 'new kind of' summer {it certainly took me a long time}
So this summer I wanted to brainstorm with the girls a really simple list or sketch of our at home, nothing on the calendar days. {basically all of the days til September} Although we love to relax {see above} we need a bit of structure in our days. Not all children do. Not all families do. We do.
Reason #1
The girls and I always 'feel better' when we get a few things done. The relaxing just feels better that way. (see quote above)
Reason #2
We do have dreams for all of these weeks and months off. We are idealistic and dreamers. I have tea parties and Bible studies with my girls that dreaming about have actually 'gotten me through' this school year. Making these dreams happen takes a bit of planning. There is still dinner to cook, laundry to do, a bit of cleaning here and there. There is a little yellow bird in our living room to take care of. So to fit in the 'dreams' we all have having a Summer Days List helps us to get those 'must dos' done so there are more time for dreams.
Reason #3
We have goals for all of these weeks and months off. There are things that we all individually and as a family want to accomplish. Abigail wants to get into the next level of the Suzuki orchestra. That doesn't just happen. It takes a bit of focused practice in the summer. Anna will be taking a college class through Boston College. That doesn't just happen. She'll need to log in, participate in the classes and do the work. I want to revamp our 4th grade spelling program during the summer so we're ready to go in the fall. That doesn't just happen. It take a bit here and there. We have gardening goals and fence painting goals. We have house projects and those don't just happen. So getting our 'must dos' allows us more time for goals.
Reason #4
Some day when my girls all adults they will need to find a way to get some things done. Even when their dreams and goals are calling them - I want them to know there is time for everything. Just not all at the same time. By finding a way to work through the regular things that are part of life quickly and efficiently there will always be time for dreams. Doing this Summer Days List each summer has really helped to show them a way that works.
So this is how we do it - - the Summer Days List needs to come from them, not from me or from Scott. We can suggest and guide but the whole set up needs to be from them.
So our lists are all set. There are three sections.
Section #1
These are the things that must be done each day no matter what. They are not chores, they are responsibilities. There are no screens until they are done. Period. That is our family rule.
Section #2
These are some goals. They might be on a screen before them but they need to be a daily part of life.
This year I moved Bible time to this second section. My daughters are older now and I want them to have their own goals. They know that summer is the best time for us to ponder who God is - how He behaves - what are His words. It is time with God that they can find their own heart within theology.
Section #3
Getting through the first section of their Summer Days List doesn't mean screen time unlimited. I wanted them to have a list of things they like to do both independently and together that do not involve screens. Almost like little reminders... "oh yeah, I forgot I wanted to do that craft..."
One last idea - flexibility
These lists are only Monday-Friday. Weekends are off. I like a chill weekend and 'ahh it's Monday, let's be a little more productive' feeling.
Also, since the list is only one week at a time, we are flexible and these lists will adjust as the weeks go on.
I share their lists with a bit of trepidation. I wasn't sure I really wanted to - it is their list out of a lot of discussion and thought and conversation. Really, my hope for this post it to share the 'idea' behind the list - with that said, just in case they want to see their list from the summer they were 17 and 13...
I've always loved lists, plans, being organized. Being so idealistic and dreamy I've had to use a planner to hold it all for me. I want to have a Friendship Bible Study with all of the verses I've been collecting all year to teach my daughters about friendship but I still need to call the orthodontist. My planner keeps it all organized for me.
"Sometimes I fancy we do not always appreciate the value of work and how dry and flavorless life would be without it. If work were taken from us, we would lose rest also, for how could we rest unless we first became tired from working? Leisure would mean nothing to us for it would not be a prize to be won by effort and so would be valueless" Laura Ingalls Wilder
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