Monday, June 24, 2013

"But Mommy... Why Would We Celebrate?" ~ Abigail tonight

I know you've been waiting for me to be over -the - moon with it's here... the last day of school tomorrow but tonight, our last Monday night, I find myself weepy. For those of you knee deep into summer, you are wondering, what's wrong with that girl? All she ever wanted was for the school year to end for summer to begin. I've been reading about that for months! Now she's sad? 

I know it makes no sense. It's just that I'm not good at transitions. On our honeymoon I begged, begged I tell you Scott to take me home. HOME to Connecticut from HAWAII... crazy I tell you. But that's how I am. It was oh so hard to leave my parents on my wedding night. No matter how much I adored my newly married husband, I wanted to be home. That switch from home being my mom and dad to home becoming mine; mine and Scott's that was a rough switch.

So here I am... on the cusp of that I've been longing for... long summer days. Sunscreen, pool days, sticky popsicle finger days. It's here and I'm excited but I hate saying goodbye to the best Kindergarten teacher in the world. I hate the idea that Abigail doesn't belong to her anymore and she doesn't belong to Abigail after Tuesday at 3:20. They'll be new "baby Kindergarteners" (as Abigail calls them) and it won't be my daughter.

And then Anna. Fourth grade was such a transition year for her. And she was with an angel of a teacher too. She carefully helped Anna navigate though the rough waters of rocky friendships. She applauded her academically and made Anna strive to not only be top of her class but top of the grade level. That little girl who was once a behind first grade reader now top of her class. I'm so proud of her achievements this year.

It's hard friends to let go of such a magical year. The year I spent more time volunteering in the classroom than working at home. Wonderful, happy memories tucked away forever. Like these:

Kindergarten Walking Field Trip to the Park
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Fourth Grade "beach day" at the school
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Beach Day picnic friends... thank you God for sending these girls into Anna's life!
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Two more principals sharing awards... wow!
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Mexican Fiesta
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And so tonight while I was giving Abigail her last Kindergarten bath (yes, I'm a sap that way) I told her we would be going to Flat Bread for dinner to celebrate the last day of school tomorrow night. And she said, "but why would we celebrate mommy?" With a puzzled look on her face and her heart not too far from my 23 year old one that wanted to come home from her honeymoon I held her and said instead, "well, maybe it'll be a cheer up dinner.  I could use one too.  Do you love Mrs. Mulready?  (she nodded) I do too." 

So I washed the bubbles off of her, put her powder and jammies on and tucked my little kindergartener in bed.  Off to sleep she went.  And then Anna reading in bed.  I went to tuck her in and turn off her light.  All I said was, "say thank you tomorrow."  And her eyes, they filled up with tears. 

So it's not in the genes.  I've just raised girls to be grateful for teachers.  Sad when it's over, and to realize how much God blesses their lives. 

And tonight as I typed, Anna walked downstairs with silent tears.  She told me she was sorry but that after I turned off her light she stayed up and wrote a letter to Miss Kearns.  I said it was okay and that "it would be okay."  I knew she needed more.  So I held her right here at my desk.  We prayed and listened to this song.  She let out some more tears and then went up to bed again with a grateful to God heart.  So will I.  

I'm grateful for these happy, sappy feelings.  I'm grateful that my girls adore school and their teachers. I'm grateful that I was home this year to be in that class over and over. 

My last time Kinder volunteering... be still my heart... thank you God for letting me be there! 
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The greatest Kinder teacher in the world...
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Tonight, the big sap in me doesn't want to say goodbye to kinderland and fourth grade.  I guess part of me will still always be that 23 year old newly married girl who could have skipped her honeymoon and stayed at home.  And possibly that will be my girls too.  "Mommy, why would we celebrate?"   



3 comments:

  1. This is beautiful,Tara...and it tugged at my heart. I know the feeling all too well. Wanting it to be over, but not wanting it to change....

    Rest assured, friend, you are making wonderful memories with your precious girls! : )

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  2. I cried at the third grade party last Thursday (the last day) because I am almost positive that Emily will never have a better teacher than she had this year.. and Michael cried when we drove past the school on Sunday because he missed his teacher.... totally get it...

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  3. It's those darn chapters in our lives! Some are easier than others, and for various reasons. Now enjoy your summer because when school starts again, you'll be wanting the summer back. If you are like me :) What a vicious cycle!

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