Passing on Excellence of Mind and Heart

"The ways we live life, the habits we keep, the delight with which we celebrate and see our moments will shape our hearts, minds and souls for life. We must be careful to live well into the beauty that is possible so we can become beautiful inside and serve people from that place. " Sally Clarkson

So many things are a habit for us now - having the TV not on. That is a habit. It is only on for rare occasions, if necessary. We choose to fill our time face to face. In great books, listening to beautiful music, learning to play an instrument, growing and stretching, and making the time we are in our home magic. We are not a perfect family - no family is. But one thing I realize in mothering for sixteen years is that filling their days, our days with goodness, rich conversation, a home with a calm delight, that fills my soul and theirs as well. 

I don't spend a lot of time anymore on this blog - but I am not ready to let it go either. Teaching and raising my daughters fills my days. Being a homemaker, a wife... it's my heartbeat. I don't do anything perfectly - but I know what I love and how I want to fill my daughters days and hearts. 

"And so it is, we cannot pass on civility, beauty, intelligence, excellence of mind and heart, if we do not ourselves make these virtues a goal of our lives...

Whatever we pursue and cultivate will determine what we are also able to pass on to all who we encounter...

As stewards of our souls, we must seek to cultivate a garden of beauty--it must be a regular habit, a discipline, to expose ourselves to great minds, the best musicians, fine artists, great theologians, wonderful biographies--so that our souls will indeed reflect a museum of His great character and nobility--that of our great king." Sally Clarkson

I love that- as stewards of our souls we MUST seek to cultivate a garden of beauty.

Our weekend was beautiful and simple.

 Friday - these two spend so much time together. They are the best of friends. 

Saturday - a morning Bible study and a sweet mug for spring 

Sunday - Anna in her first live College of the Holy Cross class of 2025 seminar all about the first year. It was so exciting! 

and cookies for lunches this week. 

Sticking that Vibrato

Abigail is quite a wonderful violist. Concerning viola she does get overshadowed by her big sister who is an accomplished violist playing in Giovani Solisti. 

Yesterday both girls played in a Bach concert. It was lovely {even though it was on zoom}. I long some day to sit in an auditorium and listen to an orchestra. Some day. But for now I am grateful for the Hartt School of Music that allows them to continue to perform. 

Anna recorded her piece the week before. Oh how she doesn't like that pressure in front of zoom when it is a solo piece. 

Abigail played 'live' and I got a bit of it on phone. She spoke before about Bach has influenced her. 

I love she was barefoot and playing her heart out. 

Today I made a cake for Bach's birthday - so fun! 

Three Things with Abigail

"I'd been thinking of the winter as a horrid, wet, dreary time. Now I can see other things-crisp and sparkling days, long pleasant evenings, cheery fires. Good work shall be done this winter. Life shall be lived well."

~ A.A.Milne. (author of Winnie the Pooh)

"Life shall be well lived..."

I like that - really like that.

But I do think it takes intentionality. And planning. And a purpose greater than ourselves. And with help other than others around us; more than just a fight and a will and trying to live "life well." Because I know we can't do life well in our own strength.

When I dig my heals in, grit my teeth, and really try - that's when things fall apart.

But when I lean on the Holy Spirit trust in God acting on His promises in His Word and the still, small voice in my heart, that is when I can live life well.

That is when God whispers in the early morning Bible times my greater purpose, ideas for mothering, for reaching the hearts in this stage of my daughters.

I have found that every year is a new stage. Of course.

Sure, I've been an eighth grade mama before, Anna was one just four years ago. But I've never done eighth grade with Abigail and her own 'things'. So every year is new.

Right now on my heart is the whole concept of mentoring.

My mothering has obviously changed over the years. It used to be one on one, naps and highchairs, singing and reading, playing and cuddling - it used to be teaching them how to get along, setting up fun in the playroom, sitting with them for hours and hours every day as they created imaginary worlds in our playroom.

I loved those hands on days. Loved them.

Recently (in the last year) I've been praying about how God would have me serve my daughters in their new phase. Of course there are still meals and laundry, teaching them, etc. But as I felt my role shifting I wanted more than ever to have a my mothering be with intentionality and purpose.

And that I think is where mentoring began.

With Anna mostly. Because Anna will be leaving, and I will have four years with Abigail still home.

But this weekend in my Saturday morning prayer time I felt led to help Abigail have some sweet time with me. Away from her weekend homework. A time to listen to her heart and pour into her with life-giving words.

So we did three things

1.  We baked

2.  We walked and talked

3.  I read to her

And in those three simple things we created a day that both our hearts needed; a new rhythm of sorts. One fill with things we can always come back to. This is us. This is what we do. Our home is calm, our home is peaceful. It is full of sweet music and not shows on. It is not plugged in but it is tuned in to each others hearts. 

More than ever, these days it is so important to cling to the things that matter. To look into their eyes. To affirm them with life-giving words so that they can one day go into the world knowing they matter - especially to the only One that matters. 

And that is a life that is lived well. 

"...I can see other things-crisp and sparkling days, long pleasant evenings, cheery fires. Good work shall be done this winter. Life shall be lived well."

Serving in Love

"Train up a child in the way he should go {teaching him to seek God's wisdom and will for his abilities and talents}, even when he is old he will not depart from it. 

Proverbs 22:6

"I made you breakfast Mama," she said in the sweetest voice as she balanced a tray with exactly what I eat each day. Steal cut oats, cooked on the stove with fresh blueberries. She had arranged them in a smile. 

"I brought you extra ones because I know you like a lot, and your milk too." 

The extra blueberries were exactly the loving touch I would add to the girls breakfasts year after year, in a crystal little bowl. 

And the almond milk in a tiny blue and white pitcher; just enough milk, and perfectly matched to the blueberries.

"And here is your tea. I made you chamomile because I thought you would like something simple."

The brewed from tea leaves, not even a tea bag and served in my latest antique 'made in England' find. 

She propped up pillows so I could try to sit up, and she waited for me and then handed me all of the food. 

I could barely sit up and my fever and migraine made it so I didn't know if I could open my eyes long enough to eat. But her smile, the loving care, I saw that and my heart was full. 

...............................................................................................................................

"Your hands are so hot Mama," as she gently stroked them standing by my bed. 

"It's time for you to get out of this bed and take a light shower. Do you think you could shower without falling asleep? Remember when I was little and our bathtub broke so I had to take a shower and I fell asleep and went crashing through the glass?" She made me giggle just a little even though it felt like there were little knives in my head. 

"You take a little shower and I'll prepare your room for you." 

When I came out of the shower there were clean, cozy clothes picked out for me. She had made the bed and turned down just one side. There was a note and her favorite blanket. 

In her handwriting, "Hi Mommy! Once you are done showering, make sure you put your clothes on and stay on top of the bed. Here's a new ice pack and a gray blankie. Feel better. Love, Abigail P.S. Here's an elastic to tie up your hair." 

...................................................................................................................................

I don't have a picture of the tray of food Anna brought me or even the tea. I don't have the sweet set up and how Abigail made my bed and turned it down just so. But I want to remember. 

Later that day when I could move my head and the medicine made my fever more tolerable I asked Abigail first, "how did you know what to do when you took care of me today?"

"That's easy, Mama. It's exactly what you did when I was sick. I remember when I woke up and you gave me a bath, changed my sheets, and put me back to rest on top of the bed with a light blanket so my fever wouldn't go up." 

All those times. All those years. So she knew just what to do. Just thinking about it now puts tears in my eyes. 

And Anna, when I asked her. "I know that is what you eat and you always brought me a tray of food when I was sick, so I knew." 

I never knew that the thousands of times - the late nights - the early mornings - the middle of the nights - all the times - just walking day after day being their mama - would train them. Serving them with my mama's love and heart trained them to serve in love. When I was well enough to realize all that they did, and how they did those things, exactly the way I did, I was speechless. No one could take better care of me that Saturday. And I feel grateful. 

I baked the most simple cookie I could this Sunday night and made a pot of tea for us to share so I could thank them and tell them just how proud of them I was - I am. Filling them with words of affirmation is important to me. Believing in them and letting them know with words that I noticed and that I am proud. 

Etched in my mind forever - that tray, and the way she stroked my hands... 

Train up a child in the way he should go {teaching him to seek God's wisdom and will for his abilities and talents}, even when he is old he will not depart from it. 

Proverbs 22:6