So Much to Look Forward To

I'm sad about Abigail growing out of elementary school.  She "graduates" in June.  In June I won't have a child in the safety of one teacher/one classroom all day.  I won't have a child with recess.

It bothers me so much that Anna is in high school.  And is taller than me.  And that the hard/wonderful days of them home with me all day are over.

Scott and I got away last weekend for an hour date.  We went into a cute tea shop, got tea to go, and walked around an antique store. I held his hand and we both agreed that we're going to be okay.

But we are **made** for parenting these two girls.  Made for it.  And we parent with our heart and soul, both of us.  I know many parents (even the wonderful ones) that actually look forward to the last one going off to college.  The new freedom.  Not Scott and I.  We hope it never happens.  That they'll never grow up.  That they'll be little forever.

But Scott reminds me that we'll be the 'kind of parents' who are with them every step of the way.  That we'll always be with them.  It'll just be different. He tells me that our new life will be all about the trip for the weekend to see them in college, being with them in the summer, things like that.

I trust God and I trust Scott of course, but I still wish Abigail would just stay in elementary school.

That she would keep forgetting her lunch box at school.

That she would keep having that one sheet of homework.

That she would keep needing her hair done by me each morning - braided or up in a bun.

There's a line I wrote on the bottom of my email to my classroom parents at the end of the first week of school.  "We have so much to look forward to...."

And I've written it on each email since that first day.

I believe that with my whole heart.  We have so much to look forward to.



But this backpack?  It fits her now.  And she knows this school.  Inside and out.  It 'belongs' to her.  She's not just following her teacher in like a little baby duck.



So I sigh, and tell my aching heart that wants her girls little forever, come on heart

Why are you cast down, O my inner self? And why should you moan over me and be disquieted within me?  Hope in God and wait expectantly for Him, for I shall yet praise Him, my Help and my God. ~ Psalm 42:5 

and we have so very much to look forward to!